Calling Myself an Artist has never come easily….

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Artist. I’ve always wanted to be one, but I still  hesitate to call myself that.  I know other people have referred to me that way.  I sort of cringe a little bit when I hear them say it.  I guess I haven’t become comfortable with it, or maybe I have a hard time with feeling confident about it, probably a little bit of both.   I often doubt  my abilities.  What if  the people that have said that to me, that phrase, “you’re so talented” , what if they were really just being nice or blowing smoke up my behind?  What if it’s like those singers you see on American Idol?  You know, the ones that can’t sing, that clearly have been told how wonderful they are by those closest to them…….but if those closest to them really cared how could they let them get up on national TV and sing like that?

I’m more comfortable now that I ever used to be –  I put my work up on this very public blog so that I can share it.  I think I can call myself an Artist from time to time.  Is that what I do as my job?  No, sadly, I don’t think I’ve come that far and I can’t just quit the day job.  Is it what I’d like to be able to say at some point?  Absolutely.  This summer I decided to just give it a go.  Put my art out there.  Make a wish list.  Plan for the future.  See if people are interested and if they are, hopefully they’ll buy a print or a card or a shirt.  It’s not a get rich scheme, oh no.  I think being able to sell some of your work is sort of a validation, a reason to keep doing what you love to do, even though you’d probably keep doing it anyway.    Today I started a shop at Fine Art America.  I would love if you could check on it, maybe like a thing or two or perhaps even become one of my followers, maybe even share it with others.   I’ve had some purchases on my redbubble account and I’m over the moon about it!   I’m getting better at some things, and asking for help getting my art out there is one of them.

I remember wanting to go to Art School when I was in elementary school.  One of the scammy little ads you see in a magazine.  One of my friends actually took the test and was accepted.  She didn’t go, because of course the tuition is phenomenal once you are accepted….you know, a little scammy.  I still see that advertised here and there.  Not that it’s not a real school, but my parents just didn’t think it was the best thing for me and of course I was too young to even know what scammy was.  I did take a lot of art classes in high school……as much as I could, but when it came time for college, I  went the route of what was going to support me, blah blah blah….best for your future, yadda yadda which didn’t work out anyway.  You know how it goes.

Now, I’m planning on taking the Zentangle CZT class in 2015.  One advantage of being a grownup is being able to do something like that, even though some people might view it as a little over the top, I have been thinking about it since I discovered this art form.  So 2015 is the year I’m going to just go ahead and do it!  I’m planning.  I’m waiting for the next course offerings to come out.  I’m committing to it.  I can’t wait!  This is the Art School I didn’t get to go to.

I did get to play around with Genevieve’s Mandala Stencils yesterday and I’m really happy….having an idea and ending up with this?   I’m ok with it.  I think I can use this as my contribution to Joey’s Weekly Challenge #13…

Hand Drawn Mandala 62414 002

Copyright © Christianne Gerstner 2014

While I was working on this I began thinking I should give one of these a try on some Toned Tan Paper….maybe with some pastel chalk to highlight…..

Thanks for reading.  And commenting.  And letting me ramble.

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8 responses »

  1. Hi, Christianne ~ I live just up the road from you in the western part of CT. I lovelovelove your beautiful sheep and have pinned them all. You truly are an artist….so much of what we know and believe is an inside job, I believe. I’m signed up for the November 2014 Zentangle class. Maybe you can get on the waiting list, and then, who knows? It’d be so cool to meet you.

    • Thanks Roseanne! I would love to get on the waiting list, but the last time I looked, there wasn’t one. Glad you will be taking your class this year – how exciting! I appreciate your kind words, thanks!

  2. WOW! I hear what you are saying but you are so there! Seriously, your mandala is beautiful, I can clearly see the time that went into this piece, you are artist material! I hope you will continue to share your art on my Weekly Tangle Challenge!
    ~ joey ~

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